Hiking, Travelling and Dreaming

This was intended to be my thoughts on travelling, but I'll have to tame my wanderlust for a while longer....

Saturday, April 19, 2008

It's my 3 year anniversary, not for my relationship but for my second career (as nana calls it) or for my religion....

I can't remember what it was like before I ran. I know I was more willing to indulge in greasy food and accompany Mercury to the bar. I know that clothes definitely fit differently, then my pants were usually hard to button at the waist and the glute part was less fitting- more empty! I was a stepper then and not an addict.

It wasn't my fault I fell into it. It was peer pressure from a friend, "come on, even my teachers run marathons and they're not in good shape". So I trained without a plan and a knowledge of running. It sounds silly today but then I thought that every time I had to run long. So I built up to running 1 hour and told myself each time I ran it would be for an hour!!

Luckily, I managed to finish it and my other roomie taught me the basics and hooked me up with a plan. I learned about tempo runs, strides, intervals and the long run. I only had to run long once a week!! Wow! That was a revelation that made running so much easier...

Wednesday, July 25, 2007

Back to the City!
  • I'm back. That about sums it up. It's nice to have my own space and access to public transit but I'm having a bumpy "adjusting" period. The concrete, the heat, it makes me long for a swim in the river.
  • I'm finding that I obviously don't have nearly enough hobbies. The days here remind me of Matapedia except for the scenery. I try to keep my self busy and outside but there are 16 hours in a day! And if I was working fulltime, I'd still have time to do the stuff I d now in the evenings.... running/walking/cycling
  • Definately didn't plan this right. Should have planned a 4 week stint backpacking somewhere. Instead, I feel I'm being lazy.
  • Maybe it's just me... I'm hoping to feel back to myself when work starts

Saturday, July 14, 2007

  • I can't sleep in. I went to bed early because I was tired/bored.

  • The idea of returning to Montreal scares me. I don't wanna deal with the cranky boyfriend, the heat and the financial stress that awaits me.

  • I've been coutning down the days since I got here but now I need a plan for when I go back. My parents don't understand me. They think I need a holiday. The past 3 months were a damn holiday, the longest I ever had! For years, I worked 6 days/ week during the summer. This summer was "working" in my field which was mentally tiring and even stressful but not in the same way as waitressing/ working for Ghassan! I only worked 40 hours a week and when work ended, that was it. Much different than the endless amounts of schoolwork!

  • Therefore, I need a job, something for a few weeks until I start my real job. Something to do while everyone else works. Something that I can quit easily. Besides for 3 months, I've just been spending. I can't go back there without a purpose.

  • The bf is getting to me. Complaining about his job, his hours, that he has lost contact with people. I'm supposed to be the moody one. I don't know what to say to him. Maybe if he had tried to learn French, he wouldn't have this problem. At least he gets paid for his job. Friends are overrated. I've gone 3 months without any, and without making any (apart from some asylum acquaintances). He complains he has no money. "Well quit smoking!"

  • I thought I'd make it for the last bit without any more tears, but I broke!

Sunday, July 08, 2007

Cycling, Skinned knees, Serenity
  • I feel relaxed, calm and at peace after my weekend. I was alone since my folks were in Montreal, but it was nice to be stress-free and to have a whole house to myself. Back in the day, I'd have had a party when I had an empty house, but in current day Matapedia, I have no friends. So I had a weekend to myself.
  • What started it off great was during my Friday evening run when I ran into another runner!! It was on the NB side after corssing the train bridge. She stopped me and I think we were equally shocked to see eachother. No one runs around Matapedia! It turns out she's run a couple of marathons herself and she lives down that road (towards NB's rafting grounds). Anyways she told me to check out the rolling hills that way. We went in our separate directions.
  • After that I felt inspired. Nothing could stop me as the rain started to downpour. I raced down the 132 feeling great and positive.
  • The weekend wasn't perfect. Although I wanted to cycle into town, a minor accident changed my plans. An RV near Tide Head scared me as it nearly touched my shoulder. I turned into the side of the road and my bike didn't like the gravel. The next thing I knew I was lying on my knees and hands in the gravel with skinned knees and hands. Thank God I had my helmet on!! Anyway, that caused me to head home to disinfect my gravel-ly wounds!! I kept myself busy/tough doing yardwork.
  • Now I'm at my asylum, feeling a bit tired, a bit achy but in a good way. After my long run (almost 2 hours), I lazed around for the rest of the day... reading, cleaning, cooking. Am I getting used to the boredom? Maybe I'm an official hermit now? It doesn't matter, only 11 days left here!

Tuesday, July 03, 2007

I'm going to bed early because there is nothing else for me to do. I feel every minute when I'm here but at least I feel calm and relaxed. In the city, I'm always on the go and even when I'm relaxing, I'm still not as relaxed as I am now.

There's only 3 work weeks left and I need to stop complaining. Definately, some good has come out of living in the sticks again:

  1. My mental endurance has strengthened and will someday carry me through a marathon or even an ultra-marathon
  2. I am a semi-hermit so when abandoned by pals for a poker night, there will be no feelings of being left out!!
  3. My drinking habits, which were nearly non-existant in Montreal, are extinct here!!
  4. I succesfully gave up coffee and now know I can! (but will probably start drinking it again when I get back to the city)
  5. In 2 months, I haven't skipped many runs and have been going a minimum 4 times per week, usually 5
  6. I've gotten tons of driving practice and no longer dread having to drive (but I prefer to never buy a car unless I really need one- public transit is cheaper and greener)
  7. I have realized that social contact is an important thing (exception: Autism)- more important than the 18 grand I owe to the govt!!

Thursday, June 21, 2007

I feel like everyday my goal is for the day to be over. When I get back to my room, I make an X through the day on the calendar and change into my sporty clothes. Then I hit the trail and I run. Running out here is different than running in the city. In the city, there were days I'd skip, days I'd not feel like going. But here, it's something I don't want to skip. Here, in this ghost town, where I live with a few acquaintances in a former psychiatric hospital, running is what makes me happiest.

I can leave in tears but midway through, the endorphins kick in and when I return to the rez, I may not be smiling but I feel that much stronger.

I know that the grass is greener and I'm longing to be at my home in Montreal. Once I get back, I'll be annoyed by the pollution, nasty heat and lack of a clean river to jump into!

I wish I could embark on the same kind of journey as the guy I met hiking on the SIAT. He had taken off 5 months from his investor job to hike. The SIAT was one of several and he was going all the way to Gaspe, solo, a 40 day journey!

I'm trying not to look too forward to this weekend, to prevent disapointment. Mentally, the desire is there but physically will be more of something I need to do.

Four weeks left!

Wednesday, May 23, 2007

Life is too predictable...

I think taking the job is a step in the even more predictable direction. Why do I have to be so darn responsible?

I love my profession, it will definately keep my brain active and require problem solving, but I know that I have been saying for years that I needed to travel. The longer I postpone my travels, the less likely it is that I ever leave...

Some days I feel trapped... confused whether I'm in it for me or for the other party and the comfort. 25 is too young to already be a part of an old, boring, married couple.

The space, being away, is great. However, it gives me time to think about the above!